Archive for the ‘Movies’ Category
Movie Review: Friday the 13th Part 3 (1982)
October 31, 2008
Don LaFontaine Dead, Age 68
September 2, 2008
Movie trailers will never sound the same again.
Don LaFontaine, perhaps better known as “The Movie Announcer Guy” or “The King of Voiceovers”, died yesterday from a collapsed lung. He was 68.
For years, LaFontaine lent his unmistakable voice to thousands of movie trailers and television programs. Although some moviegoers may not recognize him by name, they almost certainly know what he sounded like. Millions have heard his dramatic, low-pitched delivery.
Now that LaFontaine is dead, a question remains: who on earth could possibly replace him? Hollywood will have a tough time coming up with a man to match his talents.
He will be missed, and Quad’s Corner mourns his passing.
Movie Review: Spaceballs (1986)
June 20, 2008
While I don’t consider myself a particularly conservative viewer, I do keep a mental list of films to avoid like plague-infected vampire rats. At the top of that list, bolded and underlined, are the Scary Movie sequels and the (?) Movie spin-offs that Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg fart out every year. These travesties feature lame-brained parodies of popular scenes, gross-out humor, dated cultural references (oh look, it’s Dr. Phil, ahaha), and a kind of cheap, low-rent presentation aimed at easily misled people with low expectations.
Bearing all of these faults in mind, do I now have to extend the same restriction to Mel Brooks’s Spaceballs? After all, it features lame-brained parodies of popular scenes, minimal gross-out humor, dated cultural references (oh look, it’s the sound-effects guy from Police Academy, ahaha) and, if not a low-rent presentation, then a somewhat mediocre one. And since it’s more heavily a spoof of Star Wars than any of the other sci-fi movies it riffs, it was released three years too late. I’m torn on this one. Spaceballs was one of my favorite movies growing up, but if I gave it any kind of praise now I’d feel like a hypocrite. Is there anything that can save it from ending up on my eBay sale list?
“Postal” Receives Top Award at Hoboken Film Festival
June 16, 2008
Has Uwe ‘Turkey’ Boll finally created his (passable) masterpiece?
It would certainly seem that way, according to a Gamepolitics post this morning. The notorious director’s latest opus Postal has scored the top award at the Hoboken International Film Festival. GP received word from a press release sent by Vince Desi, head of Running With Scissors.
In addition to the top audience award, Boll received the pick for Best Director. No, I’m not lying. The results are right there on the page.
Postal had a limited theatrical release on May 23. It hits DVD on August 26.
Here’s Boll plugging his movie on FOX News:
The Legend of Zelda Movie Trailer!
April 1, 2008
To beat an old phrase to death, “It’s that time of year again.”
To coin one a friend of mine just used, “IGN has too much money.”
By all appearances , The Legend of Zelda movie could very well be real and forthcoming. The trailer shows off high production values, uses classic flashy editing tricks, promises a detailed storyline, and feeds us all the nerd-bait we can muster (I will admit, there’s something inspiring about Link adorning his green garbs like that).
But check your calenders, folks. And note the release date at the end of the video. In fact, watch it again and examine how silly the hat looks on Link. While some of us dream of Zelda hitting the big screen (and the rest of us don’t, because video game movies have a tendency to suck mightily), this, sadly (fortunately?) isn’t the real thing.
Like real life, April Fools Day is a holiday where the internet crowd loves to goof off. Some announce that they’re shutting down their websites for good, others pretend they’ve been hacked, while still others drum up crazy rumors and watch them spread through the pipelines. IGN, sparing no expense, has pulled the ultimate prank here. Not only did they deliver a fake Zelda movie trailer, they made it look real to boot, and obviously spent a ton of money and time. I’m amazed that something like this was created for only a single day of chain-yanking.
Watch. Enjoy. And remember: reality is always a fantasy on April 1.
Lindsay Lohan Joins Manson Family… Movie.
March 28, 2008
Alright, let’s get one thing straight before I delve into this story. I decided long ago (when I laid the foundation of Quad’s Corner) that this was not going to be a celebrity gossip blog. Poking one’s nose into somebody else’s private life is not the kind of writing I enjoy, or partake in. Dash whatever hopes you had of me reporting on a whipped cream toga party when you saw the name “Lindsay Lohan” in the headline.
What I’m saying is that a new movie about the Manson Family is apparently coming out (according to Ain’t It Cool News and Entertainment Tonight’s website) and Lohan happens to be in it. She will portray Nancy Pitman, who joined up with the Family, but never actually participated in the murders. She later fell in with the Aryan Brotherhood and was eventually arrested for being an accessory to murder.
The movie will be called Manson Girls, and will concern, presumably, the ladies in Charlie’s bunch. Other than that, I got nothing. There’s no official website, and no IMDB entry either. Here’s some more information on Pitman if you’re interested in that.
